corning community college State University of New York THE CRIER Let us know what you think: www.cee_cee_response@yahoo.com March 16th “The Voice of the CCC Student Body” Spring 2005 From: the Editor Lauren Andrews would like to send a special thanks to the individual(s) that found her wallet and returned it. What once was lost has now been found! It is great to know that there is some human decency left on this planet. March Madness! By Matt Roseler March 16th, 2004. The commons was the gathering place for the nation’s best in division 3 women’s basketball. Eight teams had come from what jpg’ seemed i.t* the remotest comers of the country. // Mohawk Valley Community College, hailing from Utica, New York, they boast an astounding record of 32-1. Monroe College, from the big city, Bronx, New York, they sport a record of 30-1. Brookdale Community College, from Lincroft, New Jersey, a team with a slightly less impressive record of 18-9, this team could be one of the two underdogs her at the tournament. The other underdog, Montgomery College-Rockville, Maryland, just north of the big city Washington D.C., comes to play donning a record of 17-7. Perhaps these two teams are not underdogs at all; perhaps they come from much tougher divisions and plan on rocking the rest of the competition back from whence they came. Joliet Junior College, from Joliet, Illinois, brings with them a record of 24-8. Bunker Hill Community College, from Charlestown, Massachusetts holds firm in standing with an impressive record of 23-3. Madison Area Technical College, from Madison, Wisconsin, a record of 21 -7 has them somewhere in the middle -technically speaking of course. And then there is Anoka-Ramsey Community College, all the way from Coon Rapids, Minnesota, a virtually untarnished record of 25-1. I look forward to seeing this team play, there’s just something about the name that intrigues me. I am going to go out on a limb and put them on top right now. Anoka-Ramsey NJCAA Division 3 Finals Champions and you read it here first! Eight teams all ready to play some fast paced in your face, drive the base line all the time, and fake you out of your socks as I pass the rock basketball! I love it BABY! I know I know -get a hold of myself-1 am sure you all want to know about the Welcome Banquet. It was a grand affair indeed. Coming Community College really knows how to host an event; Leo’s food and staff were amazing! There were guest speaker’s some who you might know and some who might want to know. So here comes the A-list: Floyd “Bud” Amann, Ph.D., President of Coming Community College. Jack Kelley, Vice President/Dean of Student Development at Corning Community College. Woody Knowles, Director of Athletics/Student Activities at Coming Community College. Stacy Johnson, Tournament Director, Coordinator of Athletics at Corning Community College. Amy Tagliareni, NJCAA National Office. Dr. Donna Genova, Chairperson of the Division 3 National Women’s Basketball Committee. All who spoke had much to say to the young ladies who were about to do battle on the court over the next three days, but the most motivating of speeches came from the creme de la creme of speaker personalities, Faye Young Miller, former player at NC State and WBL Professional League. Ms. Faye Young Miller is now a Head Coach at Ithaca High School. She is also the author of the book, “Winning Basketball for Girls.” 30 years after ....______ playing she I Faye YoungMiller, featured speaker is still involved in basketball and loves every minute of it. Faye Young Miller talked to the girls about many things in her speech but what was most interesting was the analogy made about the Canadian Geese. The analogy was referenced to bring into question what it is like to fly with a group rather than alone. It is much harder for the geese to fly out of formation because of drag from the winds, not to mention the lack of support from the group. When they fly in formation there is a rotation of the lead bird, and as a “team” the geese can fly statistically 71% farther. (Interesting fact) “It is such a privilege to play on a team that you can make better, and makes you better.” Faye Young Miller remarked towards the close of her speaking. I am in agreement, as I am sure that the ladies of all eight Division Championship teams are as well. It will be exciting to see which team, which ladies, and which coaches can rise to this splendid occasion, to produce the wins necessary to fly the farthest and call themselves NJCAA Division 3 Champions. Good luck ladies! I will be watching with anticipation. Division III Women's National Basketball Championship March 17, 18,19, 2005 Game Times: 1:00, 3:00, 6:00 & 8:00 p.m. each day Ticket Prices: Session Ticket ~ $5.00 Day Ticlcet -$7.00 Tournament Ticket - $18.00 CCC Gym Jesus Christ! What’s the Matter? Bv Beth The Bible contains many lessons, and the first is about revising your work. After spending six days creating the heavens and the earth, humanity and everything on our planet, God took the seventh day off to rest. Had he spent the seventh fine-tuning the universe he might have corrected a few flaws, like malice, deformity, badly-fitting tectonic plates and Chihuahuas. For some people ‘creation’ is a microcosm of all that’s wrong with the religion, while for the others it’s a belief that must be defended at all costs. The battle between these two camps is fierce and has helped contribute to a very negative view of science. In fact, believers have nothing to fear from science itself. Science is not inherently anti-god or anti-creation, but a subject whose underpinning theories urge observation, examination and conclusion in order to reveal the truth about how the universe works. If there is a God, then science will find it and how it affects the world. It just so happens that, as far as creationism is concerned, all the evidence points elsewhere. But you’re a believer; you don’t use evidence, that’s the point. Yes, there are plenty of scientists who use their subject as a club with which to beat the faithful, but science isn’t simply a band of grinning atheists trying to ruin Christmas. In fact, science requires a good deal of belief too. For the average Joe there isn’t much practical difference between some bearded old guy appearing with two slabs of rock going ‘hey, guess what I’ve just seen’ and the conclusions of modern science. We are expected to accept the existence of atoms, quarks and thousand dollar bills without ever seeing them and trust that the evidence is really there. I’m sure some scientists will say ‘but you can train up and read the reports’, a perfectly good idea until 2011, when 99% of the population graduates in physics and there’s no one left to feed the cows. Ironically, Bishops used to say the same thing, although the training involved sitting in a small monastic cell, eating slightly moldy bread and waiting for the hallucinations. Should science ever manage to explain every aspect of life and existence in the universe — a task sufficiently far off, so we don’t have to worry about it — without any evidence for God, then believers might have to have a rethink. But wait, I hear some creationists cry; absence of evidence isn’t evidence of absence! A fun notion, but think of science like a court, the other place where evidence is weighed and used as the sole basis for conclusions. I’m not going to be put in prison for a crime there’s absolutely zero evidence I committed. Well, unless someone thinks I look like a terrorist... Third-grader commutes to school by mule JAMES MacPHERSON Associated Press BISMARCK, N.D. - Saje Beard’s half-hour commute to class is the envy of her four classmates at a one-room schoolhouse just south of here. Most mornings, the third-grader makes the trek on Ruth the mule. “She’s called many things, but Ruth is what we call her in public,” Saje said of the 4-year-old gray mule. “Actually, that’s my dad’s joke. She’s really nice and gende. And she sure is smart.” Saje, 9, is an old hand at maneuvering mules. She’s been doing it since she was in first grade. “I feel safer with her riding a mule than having her ride in a car or on a bus,” said her father, Marty Beard. At the Manning School, about 15 miles south of the North Dakota capital, Saje “parks” Ruth by tying her with a bowline to a tree near swing sets and monkey bars. Ruth then gets some leather hobbles attached to her front legs; a routine Saje began after her other mule, Shirley, got loose and ran home from school last year. Saje’s classmates, who are in kindergarten through fourth grade, help take off Ruth’s saddle and tack. It’s stored in the school’s cloakroom, next to basketballs and other playground equipment. The five children then run to the school’s flagpole to recite the Pledge of Allegiance and sing the national anthem. The mule, named Ruth, prances and kicks up dirt as the children sing. “It’s cool,” Lucas Irving, 10, said of his classmate and her mode of transportation. “She’s cool.” Saje would ride Ruth every morning, but her dad won’t let her if the temperature is below zero - “even if she insists.” Saje proved just how much she’s willing to endure on a recent trek to school in below-freezing temperatures and strong winds. “My cheeks are burning,” she said, “but that’s OK.” Saje gets up at sunup to prepare for school. She brushes Ruth and feeds her grain, then hoists an old saddle that weighs nearly as much as she does over the chubby mule. “Come on Ruthie, come on mule,” she says as she leads her mount to the front yard. Saje raises her foot above her head to reach a stirrup, pulls herself up and swings the other leg over. She pulls down the coonskin hat her father made and gives Ruth a gende nudge in the ribs. “Let’s go girl,” she says. Saje has corn and sweet peas stuffed in saddlebags for Ruth’s lunch and for treats during the school’s three recesses. Pier homework and a tuna fish sandwich are in her backpack, tied to the mule. Saje and Ruth follow a gravel road and pass dozens of horses from other farms during the two-mile trip. Ruth is fitted with special carbide-studded shoes to make the already sure-footed animal even more so, especially on ice. Mules are known for protecting themselves and their riders. Marty Beard said the mule would likely attack anyone who hassled Saje along the route. “She would probably implant those special shoes on their forehead,” he said. The trip home always is a little faster: Rudi knows she’ll have some grain waiting, so she picks up the pace without prodding, Saje said. Kris Beard, Saje’s mother, said even some of their rural neighbors find her daughter’s mule commute unusual. “It’s not strange for us, but for other people it is quite different,” she said. “We’re very fortunate to live here.” “11 Things I hate about my teachers...” 1) The Dare Devil What is the point of having a teacher who talks in riddles and hits students with sticks? 2) Helen Keller I can never seem to hear what she has to say. My teacher needs to speak up. 3) Freddy Kruger My teacher never let me scrape my fingers down the boards. Talk about boring. 4) Home school student who just transferred Who’s that big mouth know it all at the front of the classroom? 5) He-Man The teacher thinks he is the master of the universe, but everyone knows “I am the master of the universe, I have the POWER!” 6) Student with schizophrenia What do you mean detention? We were here yesterday. 7) Karate Kid Mr. Myagi always made me wear a queer little robe and call him sensei! 8) Jedi-in-training (After he notices green stain on shoe) I think I stepped on Master Yoda! That’s what he gets for being so friggin’ tiny! 9) Student of Dr. Dick Solomon (aka, tall guy from 3rd Rock from the Sun) I’m getting the feeling my teacher’s not from around here. His lectures are constandy interrupted by messages from what looks like a spaceship, and I really wish he’d quit licking the desk. 10) My teacher took my baseball! Have you seen my baseball? 11) Janitor I hate it when the math teachers write the problems on the wall in red chalk! That shit is a pain to get off! Next issue: “11 Things I hate about little green people (Happy Saint Patrick’s Day!) Send in your pet peeves to cee cee response@yahoo.com! ‘Goodbye Letter to Drugs’ By Jason Murdock I am speaking to you for the very last time; never again will there be another pill, drink or line. To live without you to me seems so unreal; but litde did I realize how much you would steal. You’ve raped me of everything; you’ve taken my life, twelve years of pain, anguish and strife. In the beginning however, it was hardly that way, we had fun together, everything was okay. But in no time at all we became more than just friends, on your highs and your comfort I began to depend. I relied on the pills, booze and the coke, I couldn’t get enough of your poison, and I drank till I choked. Would that stop me? No, I’d take pill after pill, and day after day I felt more and more ill. And through a rolled dollar bill up my nose, cocaine it crept, putting holes in my brain, the cocaine, as it left. Then one day I took a look in the mirror and wept, because I looked of corrosion and death. It was then that I realized you were not my friend, even though I was convinced in only you I could depend. Then it hit me like a ton of bricks falling from the sky, that all you had done for me was made me cheat, steal and lie. You neglected to tell me the price that I’d pay for your high, and you neglected to tell me it was with you I would die. So, (Hmmm) so farewell mother fucker, so long and GOODBYE! Movie Review: National Treasure By Neith Little There are some movies that manage to be both brilliant and fun. National Treasure may not be one of them, but it at least achieved the latter part. Last Thursday the Activities Programming Committee showed National Treasure in the Commons. They broke with tradition by screening it during the daylight hours, which probably annoyed those with busy schedules, but which I appreciated, as I don’t have a car and rely mainly on the bus service. There were also some lovely gooey cookies. Basically the plot of National Treasure is that Benjamin Franklin Gates (Nicholas Cage) has spent his life searching for a fantastic treasure hidden by the Masons (a secret society), finds out that there is a map to it on the back of the Declaration of Independence, has an argument with his villainous business partner over whether or not to steal said Declaration, nearly gets blown up by evil dude, and decides to steal the Declaration anyway to save it from the clutches of the villainous, now ex-business partner. In all honesty, the plot doesn’t hold up under close inspection, but the movie has enough good moments to make it fun anyway. My personal favorite is when Ben attempts to explain to the obligatory pretty lady historian, in non-crazy language, that there is an invisible treasure map on the back of the Declaration of Independence. Aside from the plot-holes, it was a pretty good movie by my standards. It was fun and educational; things blew up; the ending was happy, if scattered; and there were several handsome guys; which is really all I ask of a movie. Also, the writers managed not to kill off the comic relief character, which is always a plus. They didn’t achieve even that much in Dungeons and Dragons, which is why I quit watching that movie half way through. Cool digital dragons or no cool digital dragons, there was no way I was going to watch the surviving “hero” mope for the remaining hour. But I’m getting off topic. But, back to National Treasure\ If you have kids, it’s probably safe to let them watch it. It is an action film, but the violence is practically nonexistent. No one is shot, although one security' guard is zapped by a stun gun or something. I don’t think anyone even throws a punch. There are a couple of mummified bodies, which have come to be par for the course in treasure hunt movies; a few explosions; one kiss; a bad-guy-diug who falls to his doom, never to be seen again; and a somewhat “yucky” scene in which our hero Ben cuts his thumb to get blood to decipher a clue. It could be scary to young children, but compared to most action movies, it’s pretty mild. There may be more intelligent and revolutionary movies, but for a mental break from homework, I’ll settle for fun, and National Treasure was definitely that. Internet Pirates Corner A precious little girl walks into a pet shop and asks in the sweetest little lisp, “Excuthe me, mithter, do you keep widdle wabbits?” As the shopkeeper’s heart melts, he gets down on his knees, so that he’s on her level, and asks, “Do you want a widdle white wabbit or a thoft and fuwwy bwack wabbit or maybe one like that cute widdle bwown wabbit over there?” She, in turn blushes, rocks on her heels, puts her hands on her knees, leans forward and says in a quiet voice, “I don’t fink my pet python weally gives a thit.”